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It's not a secret that relationships and community involvement lead to increased happiness levels, as well as improved mental and physical health. Yet, as our adult responsibilities stack, a time comes when many of us look around and internally remark, "I swear I used to have friends. Where did everybody go?"
If you've experienced this feeling, you're not alone. In his book, Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect, author Matthew D. Lieberman compares two surveys conducted almost twenty years apart. In the first survey conducted in 1985, the average response to the question of how many people participants had in their lives to discuss important matters was three. However, in the second survey conducted in 2004, the most common answer was zero. This troubling trend has only continued as loneliness rates have more than doubled since the 1980s, leading US Surgeon General Vivek Murthy to declare loneliness an epidemic.
Having grown up extremely shy, with a debilitating stutter, making friends didn't come easily to me. But over the two decades living across three continents in nine different towns, where in each place I've had to make an effort to make friends, I've learned some tactics to create meaningful connections that can help reverse adult alienation.
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Recommended Reading
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Shy by Design: 12 Timeless Principles to Quietly Stand Out
In Shy by Design, Michael Thompson shares his inspiring journey from being riddled with self-doubt due to his shyness and debilitating stutter to becoming a sought-after career coach, university leadership lecturer, and strategic communication advisor. The book offers timeless principles to help readers embrace their unique strengths and see their perceived weaknesses through a more empowered lens. Whether you are a recent graduate, a seasoned executive, or someone seeking personal growth, Shy by Design will provide you with the motivation and action steps to embrace shyness as the superpower that it is.
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